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  He pulled her close so her face was pressed against his chest. She tried to fight against him, to pull away. To have distance between them.

  Simon wouldn’t let her.

  His grip remained firm and all she did was exhaust herself until she finally relented and sobbed against him.

  He stroked her hair.

  “I wasn’t a good enough man for you. I don’t regret killing Ryan. For a short time, I thought I did. I didn’t. Killing that smug bastard wasn’t a mistake, not to me. No, what was the mistake was doing it in front of witnesses. I wasn’t patient. I fucked up. I had no choice but to leave and to do so, I had to control this … rage. I needed to become a man for you, Tabby. It showed me that I was still a fucking boy. I thought I was a man, but I had yet to grow up.”

  He kissed her lips, pulling her away from him. She stared up into his eyes. “That’s why I walked away. That’s why I did what I did. This wasn’t easy. I saw how weak I was and I couldn’t allow that to touch you.” He stroked her cheek. “I’m not letting go. I’m not walking away. Where you go, I go. I will follow you everywhere, Tabby. You own my heart and soul.”

  ****

  When it came to Tabby, Simon knew deep in his soul he was always a little selfish with her. He never wanted to share her. Always wanted to be around her. Ever since they were kids, he’d been obsessed. He didn’t consider it that dangerous. For him, it had always been and would forever be love.

  Tabby sat in the center of the sitting room. She’d moved the coffee table to one side, her legs crossed, hands on her knees.

  She was meditating. He knew the moves as he’d watched Dick do that and yoga for many years. He watched her take a deep inhale and slowly exhale.

  Sipping at his coffee, he couldn’t take his eyes off her.

  She was beautiful. No doubt about it in his mind.

  “Why do you keep on staring?” Tabby asked.

  He smiled. Her eyes weren’t open. “Because you’re the most beautiful thing in the room.”

  “I’ll believe that when we’re in a room full of women.”

  “You know you’ll always win.”

  This time, she opened her eyes and smiled. “You can’t sweet talk me.”

  She had yet to say she loved him back.

  He got it, more than she realized. He’d hurt her deeply by leaving. Maybe if she hadn’t seen him actually kill another man, she wouldn’t be so pissed at him, but for now, she was still in the hatred part of their relationship.

  Simon knew it wouldn’t last too long, he hoped not.

  You’ve got to take her back to her son.

  It had now been a week and if he knew anything about kids, Nathan would be missing his mother dearly.

  What he didn’t want to do was let her go. Not until they resolved these issues.

  Getting to his feet, he walked closer to her and sat down. He placed his coffee cup beside him.

  “What are you doing?” she asked.

  “Did Dick show you how to do this?”

  Her eyes opened again and she nodded. “During pregnancy. It was a tough time. My blood pressure was up. I couldn’t relax. I felt sick all the damn time. I was of course miserable, and yeah, it was a hard time.” She shrugged. “I coped the best way I knew how but one day, Dick saw me struggling.”

  She giggled. “Who knew he could be so persistent when he believes he’s right about something, huh?” She waved her hand in front of her face. “Anyway, moving on. Daisy joined me and even Miles and Anthony. Dick had me and my big giant belly on the ground, and at first, I did nothing but called bullshit on the entire thing. He wouldn’t give up and so, I finally relaxed. Before long, I realized I’d been sitting for nearly an hour and I felt more focused. Calm. I’d never experienced anything like it. He spent a good couple of days showing me all the necessary moves, and when he left, I started to do it regularly.”

  “Then show me.”

  “It’s more about taking deep breaths and finding a place of calm.”

  “I don’t mind.”

  She offered him a sweet smile.

  He watched her get comfortable and it suddenly dawned on him that the couple of times they had sex, he hadn’t used a rubber.

  Shit.

  Protection had been the last thing on his mind.

  All he’d wanted was to be inside his woman. To remind her who she belonged to. Running a hand down his face, he realized he was constantly fucking this up. It didn’t seem to matter that his heart was always in the right place. Tabby suffered.

  “Can I ask why you’re meditating?” he asked.

  “Shh, be silent. Be still.”

  He reached over and took both of her hands.

  “That’s not being any of those things.”

  “I know. I don’t want to.” He brought her hands up to his face and kissed them both.

  “Simon, this isn’t helping.”

  “I love you.”

  She opened her mouth and he waited for the words, but her lips closed. No sound came out. He sighed. Kissing up the inside of her left arm, he trailed his lips up and up, going toward her neck.

  Tabby released a shaky sigh. “You’re not helping.”

  “I hear there is another good reliever of stress.” He flicked his tongue across her neck, right over her pulse. They had a lot of time to make up for.

  She could be pregnant.

  Talk to her about that little piece of info.

  He didn’t ask. There was no way he intended to break this moment by putting them down another argument path. Sure, it usually led to sex or at least him holding her, but for now, it wasn’t going to work. All he wanted was to feel Tabby without any of the fighting or the worry or the fear.

  He didn’t believe that was too much to ask. At least he hoped not.

  Sliding his tongue down from her neck, he teased across her collarbone. He didn’t linger. This was about her, not about him, at least not yet.

  The shirt she wore was way too big and all he had to do was slide it down her arms to expose her chest. He probably should buy her some additional clothing but for now, he loved seeing her in his stuff.

  “Simon, this isn’t helping.”

  “I think it is. You’re breathing deep so you’re doing the right thing. Your nipples are nice and hard. I bet your pussy is wet for me too.”

  She moaned.

  As he nudged her back, she didn’t fight him.

  He cupped her between her thighs, feeling the heat, and shoved his hand down her large sweatpants to finally cup her pussy. He found her soaking wet. He smiled. “See, you want this.”

  “This isn’t going to solve anything.”

  “You’re right, it won’t solve anything, but it’s going to make us feel good for a little while.”

  “For how long?”

  “For however long we allow it.” He tore the shirt from her body, not caring about the item of clothing. Once it was in shreds, he dropped it away from her body. Next, he took the baggy sweatpants in his hands, sliding them down her legs, and he groaned at the sight of her.

  She was beautiful.

  So perfect.

  And she belonged all to him.

  She didn’t have any spare underwear, which meant he didn’t have to fight to remove them.

  Lifting her foot, he brought it to her lips and pressed a kiss to her inner foot. She let out a moan.

  Trailing his lips up the inside her of her leg, he got to her apex, stopped, and lifted her other foot, doing the same. This time, she gasped, arching up, but again, he kept her waiting, kissing her, and then to her stomach where he saw some stretch marks from where she’d been pregnant.

  She put her hand over them and he pushed it out of the way.

  “Simon?”

  “Every single part of you is beautiful and I won’t have you thinking or believing anything else.” He kissed her stomach, tracing his tongue down. The scent of her arousal drifted toward him.

  Lifting her legs, he sat back and reached towar
d her pussy. He spread her lips and stared down at the wet slit. Her clit was swollen and he got a nice peek at her cunt. She was tight.

  He eased a single finger inside her, feeling just how tight she was. Adding a second, he began to stretch her open. Pressing his thumb to her clit, he stroked her, feeling the answering pulse of her pussy as she tightened around him. In and out he thrust.

  He couldn’t stand it any longer and he removed his fingers, replacing them with his mouth. First at her clit, he stroked over the bud, sucking it into his mouth, using his teeth, creating a little pain before softly stroking her.

  Twirling his tongue around, he moved down and fucked her pussy. Plunging inside her. He held on to her hips, keeping her in place as he ravished her pussy, tasting her.

  He wanted her to come on his tongue.

  His cock was so hard it was a tight fit inside his pants. He didn’t care. Tabby thrust up against him, moaning his name. He loved the sound more than anything.

  Moving back up to her clit, he focused on the tight nub, drawing circles, sliding back and forth. Her body changed as the orgasm started to take effect. A nice flush crept up her body, and the instant she spilled over the edge, he saw it, felt it, and he rode that wave with her, using his tongue.

  His name a perfect mantra spilling out into the room.

  Afterward, he pressed a kiss to her pussy.

  Tabby suddenly shot up into a sitting position. She nudged him back and before he knew what was happening, she had his waist straddled. Her arms were around his neck, and he ran his hands up her back, cupping the back of hers as she ground herself against him.

  Together, they reached down to deal with his jeans, both of them wanting them out of the way. All he wanted was to be inside her.

  With his dick out, he worked the length. Tabby positioned herself over him, lining the tip to her entrance, and he watched as she took him.

  Inch by inch, she slid down, and he fucked his way up inside her. They both moaned together.

  The pleasure instant.

  Intense.

  Tabby’s arms came around him, holding him close.

  He thrust up against her as she bounced on his dick. Their movements in perfect synch, as it was always supposed to be.

  She arched up. Those gorgeous tits pressed against his face, and he took one, licking the tip of each one.

  He couldn’t let her go, not that he wanted to.

  She was perfection.

  “Fuck, Tabby, do you have any idea what you do to me?” He growled the words against her lips, but she didn’t say anything. All she did was ride his cock. Her eyes closed and his orgasm began to build. Feeling her slick, pulsing pussy. It was more than he could stand and no way he could make this last any longer.

  He came, grabbing her hips, holding her firmly in place as he spilled every single last part of him inside her, flooding her pussy with his cum as he did so. Over and over, he gave her it all.

  She collapsed against him as the last of his release ebbed away.

  “I love you too, Simon. I just don’t like you.”

  Chapter Eleven

  Tabby rolled over, wondering why she was in bed at five o’clock in the afternoon. She never took naps during the day. Only when Nathan had been little had she allowed herself that kind of luxury, and it had been right after her parents had advised her she do it, otherwise, she was perfectly content to not ever do it.

  Sitting up on the bed, she heard voices. Loud male voices. It kind of reminded her of home.

  Swinging her legs off the side of the bed, she lifted herself up and slowly made her way toward the window in the sitting room. The front door was closed but she wasn’t willing to just go and see what all the fuss was about without at least having a peak first.

  Nibbling on her lip, she looked out the window to see Simon in the center, slapping hands with—she frowned. Five guys? No, six. There was Dean loading something off the back of a small pickup truck.

  She didn’t recognize it.

  Folding her arms, she watched the men. They were close, she saw that. Were these the men he’d met during his time away? Why hadn’t he come and gotten her? Was he embarrassed by her?

  One of the men headed toward the door. She didn’t move away from the window. She kept her stance, waiting for him to enter.

  He was a large man, but then they were all large. One of them was huge though, well over six feet, and seemed to tower over the group. He stood next to Simon, head thrown back, laughing at something said.

  Simon wasn’t that funny.

  This guy glanced over at her.

  “Oh, hi,” he said. “Si said you were sleeping. We didn’t wake you up, did we?”

  “I wasn’t sleeping.” She kept her gaze on the window.

  “You’re Tabby, I take it.”

  She turned toward him. “You know my name.”

  “Of course. All of the guys know your name. Simon wasn’t exactly secretive about the woman he had back home. He talked about you a whole lot.”

  “He did?”

  “Yep. You’re pretty special to him. We all know that.”

  She nodded. “I’m sorry, I don’t know your name.”

  “Pa.”

  Tabitha frowned. “Pa?”

  “Yeah, that’s me. I’m Pa. The real name is Patrick but because I’m the oldest one of the guys, they decided to name me Pa, as if I’m some kind of dad to all of them.” He started to chuckle. “I guess I am. I was the one who always made sure we had something to eat. A place to stay. That kind of shit.”

  “You kept an eye on him?”

  “On all of them, Tabby, but yeah, I made sure Simon stayed safe.”

  “Tabitha,” she said. “That’s my name. Only Simon ever calls me Tabby.” She rubbed at her temple.

  “Ah, right. Yes, of course. It’s his name for you. Sorry. Anyway, I brought a barbeque for us to have a bit of a cookout if you’re hungry. Don’t worry, Si gave me the heads up on you not eating meat, and so I got you some like mushrooms and peppers and stuff. That okay?”

  “It’s fine.” She went to push her hands into her pants pocket, only to discover she didn’t have any pants. With nothing to do with her arms, she quickly folded them again, feeling like a complete ass. This was awkward. While this man knew a lot about her, apparently, she didn’t know squat about the guys.

  “What’s taking you so long?” Simon asked, coming to the doorway.

  He glanced between them.

  “Ah, you’ve met Pa?”

  “Yep, I have. Hi, Pa.” She gave a little wave and then wanted to kill herself for how silly that seemed. She was a grown woman. This was the last thing she needed right now.

  “I’m going to set the grill up. The guys can’t wait to meet you. You’re a legend,” Pa said. “It’s been a pleasure.”

  Pa left the cabin and Tabitha dropped her hands by her sides. “He seems nice.”

  “He is. He’s a great guy.”

  “How did you meet him?”

  “At a fight. His family had been killed in a shootout a couple of years ago. The cops didn’t do anything about it. He believes they were on the guys’ payroll, so he packed up his shit, and decided to try and find the men, handle the problem himself.”

  “Did he?”

  “No, he’s still finding them. He’s a good guy, though. He has a big heart.”

  “A big heart on a road to revenge is going to get himself killed.”

  “I won’t let it.”

  “Simon, you’re not God.”

  “Can we not fight today? I know you and I have got a lot to get through and I know it’s going to be tough, but can we just hold it together for a couple of hours?”

  She stared at him. “I hate fighting. I don’t ever want to do this. I hate that we’re at this place. It sucks.”

  “Yeah, it does suck.” He rubbed the back of his head. “I love you and I know this is going to be tough. Other than Dean, everyone else I met on the road. Away from you. I don’t want to
hurt you.”

  “Simon, I get it. Believe me, I do. I mean, they’re your family.”

  “And so are you.”

  She wanted to argue, but for once, for now, she just didn’t want to have to think. “I’d like to meet them. I’d like to meet the men you call your friends and family.” She smiled, not holding back.

  Simon moved toward her. His hands going to her cheeks, he cupped her face, pulling her close. “Do you have any fucking idea how much I love you?”

  As she covered his hands with hers, it would be so easy to tell him exactly how much she loved him, but she held back. They still had all their worries and she wasn’t going to use today to put all of that crap on hold when they had a lot to go through.

  “Take me to meet your friends.”

  It would be so easy to hide everything.

  Simon stroked her cheek, pressed a kiss to her lips, and then took her hand. She didn’t fight him as he walked across the room, heading toward the door.

  Once they stepped outside, the cold hit her, and she gave a little shiver. Simon let go of her hand and was already removing his jacket, draping it over her shoulders.

  “Guys,” he said, whistling for their attention.

  Conversation stopped.

  She looked over the group. The men all wore smiles as they looked toward her.

  “You’ve heard me talk about her, but this is Tabby.”

  “Tabitha,” she said.

  “Only Simon calls you Tabby,” the group said together, making her chuckle.

  “Pa just gave us all the update. Damn, it is finally good to meet you,” a brown-haired man with short hair came barreling toward her.

  “That’s Felix,” Simon said. “He’s a talker.”

  “Yeah, right. I’m the talker. I was lucky to get a word in edgeways with this one constantly singing your praises.”

  She smiled, liking him. He seemed nice and sweet. Easy to talk to, which made him dangerous, but oddly a benefit to any club, especially when they were in trouble. Women would open up to him, spill their secrets.

  Tilting her head to the side, she watched as one by one the men lined up.