Ripper's Torment Read online

  Get over it, Judi. It’s never going to happen.

  Resting her head in her hand she read through the many articles in the book, typing away at the computer. She could have done all this work at home, but she would have been distracted too easily. Working in the computer room, helped to put her troubled thoughts at ease.

  Keep working.

  I wonder what his lips would feel like.

  The thought had her gasping and closing the book she was reading. The sound of the book closing drew several gazes. Getting up from her seat she placed the book back on the shelf. Thinking about Ripper’s lips was not something she could do.

  Looking across at the diner, her stomach started to rumble. She needed food. With food she would stop having these stupid thoughts about Ripper. Shutting down the computer and hiking her bag on her shoulder, she headed out of the library.

  Chapter Three

  Ripper sat opposite Ashley and Curse. There was a group of them waiting to be served breakfast. Pussy, Death, and Spider were also sat around the closest booths with several of the clubs sweet-butts. He saw the waitresses made a wide berth of them refusing to come and take their orders.

  “We’re not going to get served,” Ripper said, looking over the menu. There were several meals he wanted to try.

  “Mia will be here soon. She’ll serve us,” Ashley said, looking down at the menu.

  “Who is Mia?” Curse asked.

  “She’s my friend.”

  “Why haven’t we seen her at the club?” Pussy asked.

  From the look of some of the women, they really didn’t like Ashley all that much. Ripper saw all the men liked Ashley. He wondered what she’d done for them to give her the respect usually reserved for an old lady.

  “Mia’s not one for the partying or the clubs. She was at college until six months ago when her mother got sick. Her waste of a space father cut and ran with his secretary, and she’s been surviving ever since.” Ashley kept talking, and they all paid attention, apart from the women. She looked up, glancing around the diner. “Here she comes now.”

  Ripper looked in the direction where she was. A woman with similar black hair was approaching their table. She wore the waitressing uniform, and it didn’t hide her curves. Fuck, this woman knew how to walk. Glancing at Curse, he saw his friend hadn’t taken his eyes off her.

  “Hey, Ash, sorry I’m late.” Mia was patting her pockets and searching for the pencil to take down their orders. She looked frazzled in a charming kind of way. Ripper expected her to take one look at them and leave. The leather along with the design on their cuts scared a lot of women away.

  “What’s up?” Ashley asked.

  “Nothing. I had to run to the pharmacy to grab Mom’s prescription. Almost didn’t make it back for my shift.” She glanced behind her at the other women. “No one else will serve you?”

  “Nah, they’re scared.”

  Mia nodded. “Okay, what can I get you all?”

  Ashley made her order first, and the men waited to see if Mia walked away. After a few seconds, Mia looked up. “Are you the only one eating?” Her gaze went to all the men.

  They all joined in, ordering their breakfast. Ripper watched Curse, who hadn’t taken his eyes off Mia. Once she finished writing she left them to it.

  It was strange not to be judged by their cut. He was so used to having some women scamper away from them while others were all over him like a rash. Mia didn’t look scared of them. If anything, she looked more annoyed at the lack of women offering to take their orders.

  “She seems nice,” Curse said.

  “Mia’s a sweetie-pie. I just wish she knew how to relax.”

  “Doesn’t she judge you from hanging out with us?” Pussy asked, speaking up.

  “Nope. I told her how happy I was, and she didn’t have a complaint to say.” Ashley looked held her cup out as Mia returned to pour them all a drink. Curse was quiet throughout it all.

  Ripper knew why but kept his smile to himself. His friend had always loved a quiet, dark haired beauty.

  The door to the diner opened, and his own torment entered. Judi hadn’t even seen them in the diner. “Look who it is,” Curse said, nodding toward her.

  His voice gained her attention, and she looked toward them. Ripper recognized the fake smile. She was not expecting to see them inside.

  “Hey, guys, you here for breakfast?” she asked, approaching the table.

  “I think it’s more lunchtime now,” Ashley said, smiling. “Do you want to sit with us?”

  “No, I’ve got some reading to do.” She nodded at each of them avoiding his eyes. He tried not to watch her head to the back of the diner. Mia returned carrying their food.

  Ripper watched as Curse leaned in to smell her skin. The movement was slight, but their friendship was long. He recognized movements that others didn’t.

  Mia left them alone to deal with Judi.

  “I see someone has gained your attention,” Ripper said.

  Curse glared at him while Ashley perked up. “Really, who?”

  “Nothing.” Both men answered together. Biting into his pancakes, Ripper tried to ignore the woman in the back of the diner. When everyone finished, Ashley said goodbye to her friend. He stayed behind so he could have a word with Judi. She looked too pale for his liking, and he hated to think about her suffering.

  Looking out of the window, he saw the last of the bikes disappearing before heading to the back and sitting opposite the woman who was plaguing his thoughts.

  She tensed as he sat down.

  “What’s the matter?” she asked.

  “Nothing, I wanted to see how you were doing.” He leaned back, watching her.

  Judi paused, putting her fork down onto her plate. “I’m fine, Ripper.”

  Staring into her dark brown eyes, he wondered what was going on in that head of hers. She had always fascinated him, but he’d cut any of the thoughts or curiosity from his mind. For the first time in the last two years, he wanted to get to know more.

  “Really?”

  “What did you want me to say?” She hadn’t picked up her fork to eat some more.

  Leaning over, he snagged one of her pancakes and ate it himself. “Last night you killed a man. I’m not a fucking idiot, and I don’t need a degree to know it fucks with people’s heads.” His first kill had left him reeling for days. To get over it he’d drunk, done drugs, and fucked every pussy available to him to stop thinking about what he’d done. Being in the club helped him even more.

  Tears filled her eyes, and she looked down at her food.

  “I’m trying not to think about it.”

  Her voice was only a whisper, but he caught the sadness in her tone.

  “You need to think about it but get over it.”

  She looked up, glaring at him. “You told me not to mention it outside of that hotel room. Why are you forcing me to talk about it?”

  “Because I was being an ass, and you deserve better. Killing a man doesn’t make things easier. I took care of it, but you need to take care of it here.” He pressed his fingers to her temple.

  “I’m never going to be able to get over it. I killed a man.”

  “I know. I’ve killed many.”

  She closed her eyes, picking up her fork to start playing with her food. “How did you handle it?”

  “The usual way, drinking, snorting, and fucking. I doubt it’s going to work that way for you.”

  Judi shook her head. “I’ve fucked enough men.”

  His hands fisted at his sides. “Don’t,” he said.

  “Don’t what? It’s the truth.”

  “No, it’s not. You were fucked by men, forced to do it. You were never willing.”

  “How do you know?” she asked, glaring at him.

  “A willing woman doesn’t get beaten black and blue by their pimp.”

  Her cheeks were bright red. Reaching over, he took hold of her hand. “I bet you don’t even know what it’s like to experience a r
eal orgasm.”

  Shut up, Ripper.

  He didn’t listen to reason. “Do you even know what it’s like to have a man filled with the need to pleasure you, licking your sweet pussy?”

  She gasped, looking up at him. “Ripper, what are you doing?”

  “Nothing. Fucking nothing.” He stood up, throwing some notes down onto the counter. “If you ever need me, call me.”

  He stormed out of the diner, straddling his bike. What the fuck was his problem? Judi was not his problem to deal with. She was twenty years old and deserved a life of love and happiness, where all her dreams come true. He wasn’t the kind of man to give such a commitment.

  Pulling out of the town, he felt the wind on his face, not caring he wasn’t wearing a helmet. Safety was for fucking pussies.

  Ripper drove for the next couple of hours, his thoughts tormented by Judi. She shouldn’t be invading his thoughts or even occasioning his sexual ones. When he got back to the club he found Devil and Lexie hanging out. Vincent and Phoebe were absent along with the kids.

  Lexie was curled up against Devil looking pale. She was rubbing her stomach and sipping some water. Her head rested on Devil’s knee. Nodding his head toward his president, Ripper went to his room to focus on his feelings for Judi. She was just a woman and one he couldn’t fuck.

  Never going to have Judi. Stop thinking about her. She’s not yours.

  Lying back against his bed, Ripper growled as her face entered his thoughts. What the fuck was he going to do?

  ****

  What the hell just happened?

  Judi stared at the empty seat opposite her completely baffled by what happened. Picking up her fork she took a bite of her pancake then another. His words had made her wet between her thighs. Finishing off her food, she headed back to the library to finish off her computer work. By the time five o’clock came she was exhausted and headed back home. The walk was a long one, and she entered home an hour later. Lexie was in the kitchen stirring some kind of sauce on the stove.

  “Hey,” Judi said.

  “Hey, Devil and the kids are at the dinner table if you want to join them.”

  “Should you be working?”

  “I’m fine, honey. It’s just the start, and I’ll get over it. Women have been giving birth for centuries.”

  They’ve also been dying because of it.

  Judi kept her thoughts to herself and entered the sitting room. Elizabeth was playing with a book while Simon was pressing buttons on his toy making noise. She saw Devil bowed over a book reading.

  “Anything interesting?” Judi asked.

  He lifted the book up, and she saw it was a pregnancy bible.

  “Still worried about her sickness?”

  “Yes, she wasn’t like this with Elizabeth, and I’m not risking shit because of it.”

  Nodding, she put her bag down, grabbing another pregnancy book from the shelf in the corner of the room. Twenty minutes later Lexie walked in, hissing as she saw what they were doing. “Stop it, you two. I’m perfectly fine. Now stop trying to fix something that’s not there.” She set their plates in front of them.

  “Baby, I’m going to keep looking until I find out what’s wrong with you.”

  No one, not even Lexie, was going to tell Devil what to do and not to do. Lexie sighed but didn’t actually argue with him.

  “Fine, don’t worry though. It’s morning sickness and nothing else.” Lexie sat down and dived into her food.

  Judi ate with relish loving the spicy sauce. She noticed Devil’s gaze was constantly on Lexie, and yearning hit her hard.

  What would it be like to have a man who loved her as much as Devil loved Lexie? After dinner she did the dishes making sure Lexie rested. Wiping down the work surfaces, she thought about Ripper and his comment. She’d never experienced a single orgasm or known what true passion was all about. Closing her bedroom door she rested her head against the wood wishing Ripper hadn’t said anything earlier at the diner. Her thoughts were constantly on sex and nothing else. She’d been with so many men, and yet faced with Ripper’s raw sexuality she didn’t know how she was going to cope. Her emotions were completely fried. Life was better when she didn’t have to think about sex or men or anything but her coursework.

  Moving away from the door, she went to the bathroom and started her nighttime routine. It was only seven, but she needed to wash the day’s sweat and grime from her body. Even sitting in the library had caused her to sweat in the heat. There was no air conditioning inside the small building. Standing underneath the shower she let the hot water scald her body.

  Thoughts of Ripper’s large capable hands holding her invaded her mind. Pressing her palms to the tiles she bit her lip trying to contain the whimper of need threatening to escape.

  You don’t deserve love or lust.

  You’re a whore and a killer.

  Turning the heat to cold she gasped at the sudden lashing of ice attacking her skin. When she couldn’t take the chill she turned the water off, climbing out. She wrapped a towel around her body and then around her hair. The mirror was steamed, and when she wiped her hand across to view she gasped as the man from last night stared back at her. Closing her eyes, heart pounding, she forced herself to look back in the mirror to find herself staring right back at her.

  “He’s gone, and he’s not coming back.”

  Entering her bedroom she heard her cell phone beep. Frowning, she went to see who it was.

  Ripper: What you doing?

  What the hell was going on with him? They’d gotten along well for the last couple of years, but he never checked up on her.

  Judi: I’m home if that’s what you’re worried about.

  Throwing the cell to the bed she quickly dried her hair before running a brush through the length. She loved taking the time to get rid of every knot. When she first moved in with Devil, she would spend hours brushing her hair. Lexie would take over when her arms ached. The cell phone buzzed again. Dropping the brush to the bed she picked up the small device.

  Ripper: Want to go somewhere?

  Judi: Don’t you have a club whore to fuck?

  Ripper: No! Want to go for a ride?

  Glancing at the door, Judi wondered what the hell he was doing. Ripper was her friend, yet he kept a good distance from her.

  Ripper: Well?

  Devil and Lexie never checked on her anymore. There was one time Devil had walked in while she was getting dressed. She’d screamed at him, and he’d turned bright red and left. Since then, neither of them entered the room.

  Judi: Pick me up in ten.

  Ripper: Rebel!

  She smiled, going to her wardrobe and putting on a pair of jeans followed by a shirt. Tying her hair up in a ponytail she went toward her window. Slowly she climbed down from her bedroom using the brackets for Lexie’s hanging baskets for support. Lexie was standing in the kitchen, and she heard Devil talking.

  “I don’t want anything to happen to you,” Devil said, wrapping his arms around her waist.

  “I’m sure there’ll be plenty of pussy to replace me.”

  Judi watched as Devil caught hold of Lexie’s chin, turning her to face him. “I don’t give a fuck about any other pussy but yours. Promise me if this starts to feel like more you’ll tell me.”

  The raw emotion on his face cut Judi deeply. This was the kind of love people wrote about, but they tamed it to make it readable. Devil would die for Lexie and vice versa. Walking away, she left the couple to their moment. Ripper was waiting for her down the road with his main light turned off.

  “Come on, Princess. Let’s go and have some fun.” He handed her a helmet waiting for her to climb on the back of his bike.

  “What’s gotten into you?” she asked.

  “I don’t know. I needed a ride and wanted your company.”

  She held onto his waist as he gunned the machine. Pressing her head against his back she felt the power between her thighs as his bike rode the road. Ripper was an expert, and each
turn had her tightening her grip.

  “I’m not going to put you at risk. Stop panicking.” He shouted to be heard over the wind and noise.

  Closing her eyes, Judi basked in the freedom. Rob had taken away her freedom trapping her in cars, hotel rooms or even her apartment with men she didn’t want near her. She had been with them all, fat, thin, businessmen, thugs, even guys she used to go to school with. Judi shivered forcing her eyes tightly closed to rid the memories from her thoughts. She was no longer the town whore, along with all Rob’s other women.

  Devil had taken her away from the pain and the stench of sex. Would she ever know what it felt like to be made love to?

  The time passed with Ripper working the roads until he pulled up outside a late night diner. They entered taking a seat at the back.

  “What are we doing here?” she asked, sitting opposite him.

  “I’m hungry and thirsty. Order what you want. Food is on me.”

  She glanced down the menu as the waitress took his order of three hamburgers and fries with all the trimmings including slaw. Judi took a milkshake and a burger.

  “Wow, how do you not weigh over a ton?” she asked.

  “I work the shit off every day.”

  “Yeah, I heard fucking was a good weight loss program.” Judi rolled her eyes, chuckling.

  Ripper wasn’t chuckling. He looked annoyed. “I don’t fuck everything that walks.”

  “I didn’t say you did. I don’t mind you being a man-whore and all that.” She smiled at him, trying to lighten the mood. “Someone has to keep the sweet-butts company.”

  “Curse is more than enough company for them.”

  “I’m only joking, Ripper. Out of all of the men the sweet-butts talk about you the least.”

  He seemed satisfied with her answer. The waitress bought them their food and drinks.

  Ripper finished a burger in three bites. Judi stared open mouthed at how much he packed away. He didn’t look like a pig at all.

  “Does riding do that to you?” she asked.

  “How are you handling what happened last night?” He counteracted her question with one of his own.

  “Erm, I’m dealing with it, I think.”