Our War (The Family Book 4) Read online

  She swallowed past the lump in her throat. This wasn’t supposed to be happening. They shouldn’t be talking right now. She’d imagined their wedding night to be one big fight, and yet they were talking, negotiating.

  “I’m a virgin,” she said.

  “And that’s why I’m giving you space. My demands are simple. You share our bed. You belong to me. You’re mine. I want you to be happy. I have needs that when we eventually have sex, I’m going to want from you. I won’t judge. Whatever you want, we will explore together.”

  “Are you sure you want to have sex with me?” she asked.

  “Why wouldn’t I want to have sex with you?”

  “I’m not … you know … small. Slim.”

  “You have a nice pair of tits, juicy thighs, and a luscious ass. I want to sink my teeth into that ass and hold onto your tits as I fuck you, Emily. I have got no problems when it comes to your body.”

  “Oh.” His words sent a little thrill through her. “I guess we won’t have a problem then.”

  “No, we won’t.”

  “When you mean share a bed?”

  “I mean we will sleep together every single night. I will hold you in my arms. Do you have a problem with that?”

  She shook her head. “No.”

  “Good.” Jake leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her head. “Let’s play.”

  Chapter Three

  Jake had made one fatal mistake. Staring across the bed at Emily’s very sexy, sensual back, his cock throbbed to life. He hadn’t been attracted to her the few times he’d met her. They hadn’t really talked either, and yet, he wanted her. This was impossible. He shouldn’t want a wife. He had thought she would be a total bitch and make his life a living hell.

  His own mother had been the same with his father. They’d had a toxic relationship. When she died, Jake hadn’t cared about that either. His father dying had been essential to what he and his friends were doing.

  Yes, all he had wanted to do all of his life was to run away and never return. That was what a coward did, and he was no coward. He would stay and fight no matter what. Marrying Bracken’s daughter had guaranteed both families to be safe, and now they were working side by side for a better, brighter, future. One he hoped that meant he could walk down the street and maybe relax.

  It was a dream they had all had, during one of their many sleepovers. Their own personal vision of how they wanted their lives to become. The legacy their fathers had wasn’t what they wanted for each other.

  Rubbing at his eyes, he tensed up as she rolled over, and he saw she wasn’t asleep.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked.

  “Nothing.”

  “I’ve never shared a bed with anyone before. This is a little weird.”

  He laughed. “You think this is weird?”

  “You can laugh all you want. To me, this is a little weird. Every time you move or make a sound, I hear and feel you. It makes falling to sleep next to impossible. What’s wrong?” she asked.

  “You want me to share my thoughts.”

  “Consider it a ground rule.”

  “Fine. I thought you would be a bitch. A mafia princess who would make my life hard, and I didn’t expect to like you.”

  “You like me.” She pushed some of her hair off her face and smiled at him. “Should I call the media, let them know that you could actually like me? If you know I help out at homeless shelters, and work at animal ones as well, didn’t that clue you in to the kind of woman that you were marrying?”

  “I didn’t know if you were trying to piss your father off. I don’t imagine he’s too happy with how you put your life in danger.”

  “He’s not, but I don’t do it for him. I do it because I want to do it. I like helping. I’m never in danger, not really. There’s always guards around, protecting, watching. That’s never going to stop, is it?”

  “It’s not.” He couldn’t resist reaching out and touching her. “You’re actually a really beautiful woman.”

  She giggled. “How much did you drink?”

  “Not enough to send me to sleep.” He stroked her cheek. “I don’t want you to ever be afraid of me, Emily.”

  “Right now, there’s no chance of that happening.”

  “I’ve done bad things. Things that would make a lot of people sick. I’ve killed, I’ve hunted, and I’m not a good person.”

  “So? You don’t think I know that my father has killed people? I’ve seen it, Jake. I’ve seen him take a gun, place it against a man’s head who was begging for his life, and pull the trigger.”

  Jake frowned. “How?”

  Emily sighed. “It was a long time ago. I was about eleven years old. We had gone out to the country. My mom owned a house there. We were having a family vacation. Dad decided that he didn’t want anyone interrupting his time with us, so he made sure we went alone. It started out fantastic. Lots of fun, and stuff.”

  “It didn’t last?”

  “No. By the third night something went wrong. Dad got a call, and within three hours our guards were there. It started thundering and lightning, and I woke to yells, to shouts, to curses. The front door slammed open, and I rushed toward my window. Rain was pounding down, and there was a small light that showed me everything.” She stopped, nibbling her lip. “I watched as the two guards held onto this man. He was bleeding, and I heard everything. The man was pleading for his life, and my father said it would be the last words he ever spoke. He’d put his family in danger and was trying to kill him. He couldn’t let that stand. He took out his gun, pressed it against his temple, then moved it right between the eyes, and I heard the bang. I screamed, and my mom ran into my room.”

  “You must have been so scared.

  “Even when I was eleven, I knew my father wasn’t like other girls’ dads. There were too many questions, and how I didn’t know exactly what he did. I was scared, but it made me realize that nothing was as it seemed. There were people out there who would rather see us die. What I’m telling you, Jake, is you don’t scare me. I don’t think anyone can live in this life and be completely clean, do you?”

  “I want to be, Emily. That’s the point. I wanted to be. I can’t be anymore.”

  She reached out and cupped his face. Covering her hand with her own, he stared into her blue eyes. “It’ll be okay. I’m not going to run away from you, Jake.”

  “I’ve never slept with anyone either,” he said.

  “You’re not a virgin.”

  “Of course not. I’ve never slept with a woman. That doesn’t mean I haven’t fucked one before. This is the first time I’ve had a woman close to me.”

  “And we’re not even having sex.”

  “Can you even say the word fuck?” he asked.

  “Of course I can. What makes you think I can’t?”

  “I’ve never heard you say it.”

  “I don’t need to be crude.”

  “Let me hear you say it.”

  “Really? How old are you?” she asked.

  He loved her smile. It was so sweet, and yet so rarely there. In all the times that he had seen her, he’d never seen her smile so brightly before.

  “I’m old enough to know that I want to hear my woman tell me she wants to be fucked.”

  The smile vanished, and she stared into his eyes. He saw the way her pupils dilated, and her breathing deepened. She was aroused by him. Good. He wanted her to be aroused, to be desperate for him.

  This time, he stroked his hand across her arm, up to cup her face. “Say it for me, Emily.”

  “Fuck,” she said, whispering the word. Her cheeks were a deep shade of red.

  “Say you want me to fuck you. I know you don’t, but I’d just like to hear the words from you.”

  “I want you to fuck me, Jake,” she said.

  She sighed.

  “Do you like that? Do you like the thought of me fucking you?”

  “Yes.”

  “Good, because one day I will. Not because we have to eit
her, baby. No, I’m going to fuck you because I can, and you’re going to want it as well.” He stroked her cheek and stared at her full lips. “You’re so beautiful.”

  She sucked that lip into her mouth, and he just wanted to bite it himself. “Jake?”

  “It’s fine. We’re not going to do anything. I want to kiss you. Will that be okay? Do you want me to leave you alone?”

  She didn’t answer for several seconds, and then she nodded. “Yes, you can kiss me. I’d like for you to kiss me.”

  He pressed his lips against hers. At first it was just the slightest touch, her soft lips crushed beneath his firm ones. That was all he wanted, but then it wasn’t enough. He needed more, wanted more, craved it.

  Sinking his fingers into her hair, he pulled her close, and explored her mouth, running his tongue across her full lips. She gasped, and he couldn’t resist plundering inside, taking what he wanted more than anything. Taking hold of her hand, he locked their fingers together, pressing it against the bed.

  Jake pulled her beneath him so that only his head was above her.

  He pulled away. “You know we’re going to have a good time.”

  “This doesn’t mean I like you or anything.” She smiled, biting her lip. “But I really like your kiss.”

  “Why do I feel that you’re lying, baby? I think you like me a lot more than you’re making out. That’s okay. I can handle that.” He pressed another kiss to her lips and pulled away, smiling. “How about we try to get to sleep?”

  “I’d like that.”

  This time, instead of them being far apart, he pulled her against his chest and pressed a kiss to her shoulder.

  “Have you ever killed anyone?” he asked.

  She shook her head. “No. I haven’t.”

  “Do you think less of me?” He waited for her answer.

  “No, I don’t.”

  ****

  “You really think this is a good idea?” Paige asked, handing Donnie his beer.

  Luiz, Tonio, and their women were sitting in his hotel room. Their kids were already put down for a nap. He rubbed at the back of his nape, tugging Paige down into his lap.

  “I don’t know if it’s a good idea or not. Bracken has always been a man of his word. Marriage was inevitable,” Donnie said.

  “Even though we promised that marriage wouldn’t be a means of furthering The Family when we were in power,” Luiz said.

  “You’re worried,” Tonio said.

  “Of course I am. Wouldn’t you be?” Luiz asked. “We all vowed that we wouldn’t be like our fathers.”

  “You’re not,” Bracken said, entering the hotel room. He took a seat, and Donnie stared at the man whom he actually had respect for. “Sorry for the intrusion, but I figured I should be invited considering my daughter is now involved in this. We will always have enemies. That is a given. I do not see why you should be worried about future marriage proposals. I believe together we can form a future together, and I meant that.”

  “Are you not worried about your men feeling you’re weak by aligning yourself with a bunch of schoolboys?” Donnie asked. He was aware of the whispered insults that took place behind their back.

  “You’re aware of those words, and yet you don’t do anything about it?” Bracken asked.

  “You would do something? I thought you didn’t agree in violence unless necessary,” Luiz said.

  Bracken looked at each of them, clearly assessing. Donnie recognized the look well. He’d seen it enough times on the men who had sworn their loyalty toward him. “Violence for the sake of violence is not necessary. Making sure that people know to respect you, and at times even fear you is just as important. The people that claim you to be nothing more than schoolboys have no respect for you at all. In fact, I would put every dollar I own that they are planning to kill you. Now, you don’t want to be like your fathers, and I respect that. I would never have allowed my baby girl to be married to The Family. I know firsthand what happens when it goes to shit for people who hold too much power. There’s a lot more than merely being a monster. Just looking in on the outside, it looks to me like you’re afraid to do what is right for fear of turning into your fathers.”

  Donnie didn’t like how close Bracken had gotten.

  “You’re all too damn smart to turn into those fuckers. If you want my advice, don’t show any weakness. Your enemies accuse you of being exactly like your fathers, embrace it, and know the truth. You’re better than they were. You can’t run from this life, nor can you hide. There will always be someone to take over. You want to protect our families, then you will have to do what you never thought you had to do.”

  “Have you ever done shit you wished you hadn’t?” Donnie asked.

  “Every single day. This life is not for the fainthearted, but then, I’ve got a feeling you know that.” Bracken looked at each of them. “I’m proud to see all three of you sitting here, and for my daughter to be married to Jake. I know you won’t let me down.”

  With that, he turned and left.

  Paige gripped his shoulder, and he turned to look at her. “He’s right.”

  “We’re all in or not at all,” Luiz said. “There’s no way we can have this life, and pretend we’re not part of it.”

  Donnie had already figured that out while watching Jake get married to Emily. He couldn’t believe that he had done this to his best friend, but the needs of The Family were important.

  “When he gets back from his honeymoon, we’ll be ready,” Donnie said. “I’m going to go and talk to him now.”

  “Wait, he’s on his wedding night,” Tonio said.

  “Don’t care. He needs to know what’s important.”

  Leaving his hotel room, Donnie made his way toward Jake’s honeymoon suite. Knocking on the door he waited for Jake to answer.

  Seconds passed, and finally Jake stood there, wearing no shirt and a pair of sweatpants.

  “Why?” Jake asked.

  “I’m sorry to interrupt your wedding night. We’ve been talking, and when you get back, we’ve got a lot of work to do.”

  Jake looked past him and shook his head. “Get in. We can talk inside.”

  Once Jake closed the door, Donnie brought him up to speed.

  “All or nothing?” Jake asked.

  “It’s the only way.”

  “Nothing would mean certain death though, right? We both know it’s not going to be easy to walk away.” Jake paced the length of the floor. “I’m in. We may not have wanted this, but you find out where our weakest spots are, and when I get back, we’ll work together. All four of us.”

  “You’re going to go ahead with the honeymoon then?” Donnie asked.

  “Of course I am. I intend to make this marriage work.”

  “Good, I’m glad.”

  “I’m not doing it for you.”

  “I didn’t figure you were.” Donnie took his hand and gave it a shake. “I love you like a brother. Thank you for always sticking by my side.”

  “You know I was only ever supposed to be a guard to you. Someone else to put a bullet inside.”

  “I know, and again, I’m pleased that we’re friends.” Donnie pulled him close for a hug. He really did see Jake, Luiz, and Tonio as the brothers he never had. They were as close as brothers, even if they had their secrets. Even family had secrets that no one else would know.

  “Go, keep me updated.”

  “Tonio is taking over your duties while you’re away. Have fun.”

  ****

  Emily stood at the doorway watching as Donnie left. Jake hadn’t seen her yet, and she saw how tired he was. He stared at the door, and there was a firmness to his face. He didn’t like what Donnie had said, but he also believed in it as well.

  “I know you’re there,” he said, turning toward her.

  His gaze traveled up and down her negligee. It was pastel pink, sexy, and she loved the way it made her feel.

  “I heard everything.”

  “Again, I figured as much.�
� He went straight to the bottle of whiskey. “Want a drink?”

  “Yeah, I do.”

  “Do you want me to put you somewhere far away from this mess? I can have guards with you and give you a very protected life.”

  She shook her head. “No.” It was the cowardly way out. In a matter of hours, Jake had broken down all of her notions of what he was like. He was nothing like she first thought. Cold, callous, a monster—he was none of those things. There was something deep and beautiful inside him, and she wanted to be the one to bring it out.

  “You know that means I’ve got to do things you’re not going to like.”

  “I don’t care. I’ll find some way to pay you back.” She took the glass of whiskey he offered. “Don’t you think it was a little rude that he invaded our privacy?” She leaned in close. “We could have been fucking tonight.”

  He burst out laughing. “Now you say it without me asking you to.”

  “I want to keep you on your toes.”

  “We were falling to sleep. I don’t think he had anything to worry about.”

  Drinking a large swallow of her drink, she moved over to the small stereo she had seen. Clicking it on, she turned the volume up.

  “What the hell are you doing?” he asked.

  “Why should we be old, playing card games, and snuggling in bed? We’re going to be doing that in fifty years’ time.” She started to sing and pointed at him, while swaying her hips. She didn’t even care that the pink negligee showed off her body. He was pretty much naked.

  “This is crazy.”

  “Crazy? We’re two strangers who just got married. You kill people, and I help homeless people and pets without homes. Come on, nothing could be more crazy.” She finished her whiskey, placing the glass on the table. “We’re not paying for the room. My dad is. Let’s go crazy on our wedding night.” She threw her hands in the air and started to jump around, letting out great whoops.

  Jake walked toward her and shook his head. “Have you ever been to a party or a nightclub?”

  “Nope. I’m making this up as I go along.” She grabbed her glass. “Fill her up.” The song changed to another, that had her hips swinging from side to side and singing right along. When she spun around, she started laughing as Jake was rolling his hips and dancing like a girl to the song.