Lawless Read online

  Paige lips twitched and she blinked. “What’s a German pancake?”

  He laughed. “I’ve seen ’em, never eaten ’em. Should we order one to try?”

  She smiled, a barely-there curl of her lips, but it was a beautiful sight. “Feels awfully…”

  “What?”

  She shrugged. “Reckless?”

  “How so?”

  “If it’s awful I’ll still need to eat it. Why take a chance?”

  Eli mulled over her words. A chance? Like she was playing food roulette? “Paige, the only chance you’d be taking is having to wait a little longer for something else. But, you’re right. We should hedge our bets.”

  Paige opened her mouth as if to reply, but their waitress appeared and paused at their table. She appeared to be about fifty, wiry with caffeine and cigarette-fueled energy stores perched on a pair of hideous black shoes. Her hair had been scraped back into a granite-colored bun with wisps escaping at her temples and nape. “Coffee?”

  “Paige?” he asked.

  She seemed almost taken aback at being tasked to respond first, but murmured, “Yes, please.”

  “I’ll have the same.”

  “Two coffees coming up,” the waitress said and sprinted away.

  “You were about to say something earlier,” he prompted, but his attention was momentarily distracted by the sight of their waitress and the hostess watching them and chatting together. What was with these people? Was the staff surliness why this hadn’t been a favorite restaurant?

  “I’m sorry. I don’t remember what we were talking about.”

  “I said we could hedge our bets on the German pancake, and you were going to say something, but we were interrupted.”

  She removed her hands from the table and dropped them into her lap. “Oh. I was going to say hedging my bets has always meant ordering safe menu items that are difficult to mess up. Scrambled eggs. Toast. Bacon. Simple. No fuss.”

  As she spoke, he realized she might as well be talking about herself, that she believed she should be a safe and trouble-free sort of person, that maybe she didn’t think she deserved any more. Well, fuck that shit.

  They were quiet and contemplative for the next minute. Their waitress delivered their coffees and asked him if they were ready to order.

  “You first,” he said to Paige.

  “I’ll have two eggs scrambled, two slices of whole wheat toast, no butter, two slices of bacon and a small glass of orange juice.”

  “Dry toast? You want any honey or jelly?” The waitress’s volume had clicked up several decibels, like she thought she was talking to someone hard of hearing.

  “No thanks.” Paige kept her voice soft, her gaze softly focused on the disapproving waitress.

  “Okay, if that’s what you want,” she said in her extra loud tone and shaking her head.

  Eli gritted his teeth and sighed. Paige’s earlier comment about him not liking this place was beginning to make some sense. The waitress fixed him in her sights next, brows raised in question. “Two orders of German pancakes and a veggie omelet with toast. Please bring some extra butter.”

  “Got it.” The waitress took their menus, tucked them under her arm.

  “And by the way, my companion can hear you perfectly well. She’s not deaf.”

  The woman flashed him a puzzled look and then race-walked away. Paige’s jaw had fallen open.

  “They are kind of strange here,” he said.

  “Yes, they are but…”

  Eli cocked his head, wondering why she’d trailed off. “But what?”

  Paige leaned in as if to share a secret. “You don’t remember, and perhaps it’s better that way.”

  He wanted to press her for more details, but reconsidered when he realized it really didn’t matter. The past was the past. The present and future were more important.

  Despite the odd start to their dining experience, the food came quickly and was enjoyable. Their waitress slowly shed her frosty exterior, though she seemed reluctant to do so. The German pancakes were such a hit that he ordered more to go.

  When they had eaten to bursting and were even declining coffee refills, their waitress brought over their ticket. Eli handed her his credit card before she could sprint away.

  “I just want to apologize for talking to you like you was a dummy,” the woman said to Paige. “I was told…” she paused and looked at Eli, “Guess I misunderstood.”

  Paige smiled. “It’s okay. It happens a lot.”

  Eli’s gaze ping-ponged between the women. “Did I tell you she was deaf?” he asked the waitress.

  “You looked like the fella that came in with her the last time. I thought at first you was him—but you don’t act like him. I must have been mistaken,” she said.

  Paige fidgeted. “It was a long time ago, Eli. It’s not—”

  “I am the same man, but did I tell you that or not?” he demanded.

  The waitress shifted from black shoe to black shoe. “You said she was deaf and feeble-minded.”

  “Jesus-fucking-Christ.”

  “I’ll just go ring your order in now.” The waitress held up his credit card and backed away.

  “Please don’t get upset,” Paige said, her features pulled tight, brows angled downward. “You were trying to play a joke.”

  Eli threw his hands up, saying, “I’m not…” and then dropped them. “I’m not upset with anyone but myself. Honestly, Paige…” She blinked, but didn’t say anything. “Honestly, I don’t know why you were with that guy.”

  “For the same reason I’m with you.”

  Eli suppressed a groan. Not the answer he wanted to hear.

  ****

  “You about ready?” He’d settled the check, been very pleasant to the waitress, even charmed both women into laughing at a joke—a joke not at Paige’s expense.

  Paige said, “Yes, of course,” and stood.

  “I don’t mean to rush you, but I need to go meet with the bank to straighten up a few matters.” Eli took her arm, like he’d done on their way to the restaurant. He guided her back out and toward home, stopping at a neighborhood grocery store to pick up several bags of food to replenish the pantry and refrigerator. Once he’d helped her put everything away where she directed, something he’d always grumbled about in the past, he reminded her of his plans.

  “I’ll be out for several hours. Probably home around six. I’ll bring back something for dinner. You’ll be all right on your own for lunch?”

  Paige smiled and held a laugh in check. “Yes, I’ll be fine. I make a mean sandwich.”

  “I’ll bet you do.”

  She grabbed the remote to listen to the news, thinking he’d be out the door within a second. Instead, he surprised her by leaning down and sliding his fingers slowly down her cheek to her jaw. The kiss he gave her was gentle and sweet, and shocked the hell out of her.

  “You’re amazing, you know that?” His breath whispered against her cheek. A hint of the apples from the German pancakes still lingered, fruity with hints of vanilla, coffee notes as well.

  Paige grabbed his hand as he drew up to standing. “Eli?”

  “Hmm?”

  She hesitated, shy and unsure. “I’m glad you’re home.”

  “It’s good to be back. With you.”

  And then he left, and Paige began to worry anew that he would never return.

  Chapter Three

  Eli located the correct bank branch on his second stop. The first had told him they were happy to handle any transactions he might want to make, but that his safe deposit box was physically located at the main branch, not the one closest to his apartment.

  A few pieces of identification, a signature compared to nothing, proof he had a key to the correct box, and Eli was in. The bank employee inserted the master key and Eli inserted his customer key. The locks turned. The employee removed the interior box and escorted Eli to a cubicle to examine the contents in privacy.

  When he was finally alone, Eli held his
breath and opened the box.

  ****

  The next few weeks passed similarly. Eli slept in the guest bedroom and Paige slept in the master. She never lost the nagging suspicion he planned to leave her again, but so far, he seemed content to settle into a routine.

  Still, she wouldn’t be caught off guard a second time. She scheduled appointments with her counselor to practice with Daisy and to learn other coping techniques, including Braille. Heart pounding the whole way, she took her solo venture out with Daisy to the grocery store to pick up some needed items.

  Paige realized minutes after she’d safely returned home that in her angst to accomplish the trip itself, she’d forgotten to buy milk. All her mental stamina was too tapped for a second trip. Feeling wimpy nonetheless, she dialed the grocery store number programmed into her phone.

  Over the past year, she and one of the customer service managers, Marvella, had become good friends over the phone when she called in her delivery orders. Today, during the hour Paige had spent memorizing the layout of the store and collecting almost all the items she needed, they had finally connected in person.

  A familiar voice answered on the second ring with a cheery, “Wade’s IGA, your customer service rep Dana speaking. How may I help you on this wonderful day?”

  The woman could stand in for the sun on even the most dreary days. “Hi, Dana, it’s Paige Dancey. Is Marvella available, by chance?”

  “Paige! She’s with another customer at the moment, but we were just talking about you. I gotta tell you, that friend of yours was the sweetest thing. Always kept nearby, but out of your way.”

  What was she talking about? “Friend? You mean Daisy? My dog?”

  “No, silly. The man who came with you. He tried to keep it on the DL, but you know, I make it my business to watch out for my customers.” She laughed. “I confronted him and made him tell me why he was following you. That man was so proud of you, Paige.”

  That man? “You mean Eli? He was there? At the store?”

  “Eli? The one you told Marvella had died? That was him? But Marvella said… Never mind. That’s wonderful news!” She paused and added, “Isn’t it?”

  “Yes. It is. I thought he died in an accident, but they never found his body. For months he’d been a John Doe in an out-of-town hospital. He had reconstructive surgery on his face and is thinner—so he looks different. Also, he’s had some memory loss because of his head wounds.”

  “Wow. Are you serious? That’s a miracle. So, the man who was in the store today was actually Eli? Your Eli?”

  “Yes. Eli.”

  “I guess his brush with death gave him a new perspective. You know we think the world of you, Paige, but the man who used to call in orders from your address was kind of an asshole. I’m sorry to be so blunt, but it’s the truth. Marvella was going on and on about how you’d found yourself a new man after the other one died, a much better man, and we were all so happy for you.” Dana tutted under her breath. “But that was the same guy? Wow!”

  “Brushes with death can change people inside, too.” Paige wrapped a lock of hair round and round her finger. An awkward silence fell before she wrestled her thoughts away from what Dana had shared. “Oh, I called for milk. I forgot to buy some while I was there. That’s the only thing I forgot, but I really need it today and don’t have time to return.”

  “Milk. You bet. Let me just grab my order form. Afternoon delivery okay?”

  “Sure.”

  “What else, hun?”

  “That’s it.”

  “You’ll be home around two o’clock?” she asked.

  “Yes, I’m not—”

  “Oh, hold on a sec. You may not need to order anything because I see him.”

  Paige stood up and put a hand on the sofa back to steady herself. “See who?”

  “Him. Your Eli. He’s here in the store. And you’ll never believe what he’s buying.”

  “What?”

  “Milk.” Dana’s peals of laughter rang loudly through the phone. “And something else, but I best not say another word about that since it’s none of my business.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Never mind. Pretend we never had this conversation, honey.” Her voice dropped into the furtive range.

  A giggle slipped out before she could stop it. “Thanks, Dana. Tell Marvella ‘hi’ for me.” But as soon as she hung up, she wondered what prompted Eli to return to the store to pick up the missing item.

  ****

  Eli knocked softly on the door. Arms full, he didn’t want to have to set anything down to unlock it himself.

  “Who is it?” Paige called through the door. She sounded confident and strong, bordering but not crossing the line that separated assertiveness from rudeness.

  “It’s me. Eli.”

  “You don’t have your key?”

  “I do, but…”

  The lock clicked and the door opened. She stepped aside to let him in.

  “Sorry.” He extended his arm and handed her a colorful bouquet of flowers in oranges, reds and purples. “For you.” The fragrance in her arms was a blend of lilies, roses, and carnations. Paige took a step back, as if recoiling from a shock.

  “Oh, my goodness! Why?” She tilted her head to peer around the flowers, truly sounding and looking puzzled.

  “Why?” He couldn’t help but laugh. “Because no one else I know in this entire world is more deserving of having their world brightened than you? Because you made your first solo trip out with Daisy?”

  She took a few more steps back saying, “You followed me.”

  “I did. I was worried.” He shook his head. “I shouldn’t have been. You and Daisy did awesome!”

  “Thanks.” She smiled, looking more proud than pissed that he’d kept tabs on her, thank God. “And thank you for the flowers. This is a very unexpected surprise. You always used to say flowers were a waste of money.”

  Really? Had she never received flowers before? All these rediscoveries were not building a strong balance sheet for the previous Mr. Eli Logan. “I’ve reconsidered my attitude about a lot of things in recent weeks.”

  She nodded, a quick tuck of the chin, like she didn’t want to show how relieved that confession made her feel. He saw it though, the way her shoulders loosened up, the tiny twitch at the corner of her mouth. He’d made her happy. He’d made her feel more secure. He shouldn’t have cared as much as he did, but dammit, it couldn’t be helped. A man would have to have a heart of stone not to be awed by the silent strength and grace of Paige Dancey.

  He joined her in the kitchen. “The rent and all the other bills are current now, too. That makes you happier than the flowers, doesn’t it?”

  “I hope you won’t be offended if I tell you I’m happiest about what Daisy and I accomplished today and over the past week.” She tucked in another smile. “Everything since you returned.”

  He moved closer to her, close enough to count the wisps of hair that had escaped from her hair clip, close enough to count eleven freckles on her cheeks. How long had she had those?

  She angled her body toward him. “Th-the flowers smell wonderful.”

  He’d made her nervous. He needed to change that. He wanted to make up for all the lost time she’d invested in him, waiting for him to be the man she imagined and deserved him to be. It wasn’t too late to start over. He’d been drawn to her, found her intriguing, but alien to life as he’d known it. When he kissed her, however, there was nothing alien or unfamiliar at all. He wanted to do it again. He wanted to do more.

  She set the flowers down on the pass-through bar. The barrier between them removed, he slipped his arms around her waist and drew her close, his nose pressed into her hair. Slowly, hesitantly—and dammit, reluctantly—she slid her arms around him. He moved one hand up her back, feeling the sensuous curve of her spine, the dip and flare of her waist to her ribs, up between her shoulder blades to the nape of her neck. She sighed softly when he whispered his fingers throug
h her hair and cupped her skull in his palm.

  Brave, lovely Paige. What an idiot old Eli had been to treat her so abominably. Pulling her head back he murmured, “I’ll make you forget, too,” before he took her mouth with his.

  The kiss started slowly, with Eli coaxing her to respond. She didn’t need much persuasion. Her lips moved with his. Her tongue touched his tentatively at first, then with more earnestness. Eli intensified his command of her lips, her tongue, her mouth. She trembled in his arms, but Paige, his fierce soldier of hard knocks, didn’t passively submit. No. She countered his every move with one to match. Eli groaned when she slipped a leg between his and pressed her upper thigh against his groin, now throbbing with need.

  The usual battle waged in his mind. Part of him knew he was a charlatan to come here and pretend he was worthy of her. But the rest of him was convinced she was his now and always would be.

  Dammit, all those days wondering about her. Hearing the stories about her from that pathetic excuse of a human being after the explosion. She was perfect, absolutely perfect, and he would fight to the death to keep her.

  Paige moaned and shifted in his arms, but didn’t pull away.

  Eli reached down with both hands and cupped her ass, lifting her up and pressing her against his erection. He rocked his hips against hers and she rocked back. Desire spiked and he found himself lifting her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist and they were moving, kissing while he walked with her clinging to him.

  Out of the kitchen and down the hall until he entered the bedroom. He bumped into the bed and down they went. Paige started to laugh and so did he, but she pulled his head down to hers and kissed him.

  Then came the undressing. Frantic and hasty at first until he could slip a hand inside her shirt, inside her bra to find the warm flesh of her breast. His balls tightened and his cock strained against the fly of his pants. If he didn’t bury himself inside her soon, he’d embarrass himself like a hormone-enslaved teenager. As much as he wanted to savor the taste and smell of her, memorize every curve, angle, and plane of her body, this would not be the time for that.

  Paige reached up and unfastened her bra, which he was glad to see hooked in front. He’d have been fumbling in the back looking for it had she not taken charge.