Scarred Beauty Read online

  “I cut it myself without looking in the mirror.”

  “You don’t look in the mirror?”

  She shook her head. Her throat hurt from the lump. She could barely breathe. “I’ve not looked in the mirror for a long time.”

  His gaze seemed to look deep into her very soul. Noelle couldn’t turn away as she was captured by him.

  “You have no idea how beautiful you are.”

  There was no way she could be beautiful. One side of her face was a mess. She recalled spending a great deal of time looking in the mirror when she was younger. One side of her face had been pale, completely unmarked by the accident. On the other side had been the brutal, striking, deep red scar showing the ugliness of what she’d been through. Since that day where she spent most of her day staring at her reflections she’d made it a rule to never seek out her reflection.

  The other day when she’d seen herself in the window was the small luxury she allowed herself.

  ****

  Isaac saw the conflicting emotions flash across her face. His heart broke thinking about all that she’d lost. To most men, the scar would be a massive deterrent. He saw past the scar to the beautiful woman underneath. The mark on her face was pale, and he could tell the accident had happened some time ago even without her talking about it.

  Her hair was thick and beautiful. The dark red colour she had it made her skin look far paler than if she went back to the blonde in the picture. Sighing out at the unfairness of her situation, he went back to stroking the flesh of her belly. He smiled when he felt her quiver from his touch. She felt the connection as well, the electricity which passed between them. No other woman had made him so energized and desperate to be with her.

  Inhaling her lemony scent, he relaxed as she caressed his hair. If he could come home from work every day to her, he knew he’d be a happy man. She gave him peace where no one else could.

  He thought about her hair and was determined to see that she got a decent hair cut. By the time he was finished she would be able to look in the mirror and see the woman that he saw. Her kindness should be cherished. Many people would see past her scars if only she gave them time. His thoughts were ludicrous. He knew that if he brought Clark into the situation he would make him feel like less of a man because he wanted a woman who wasn’t perfect.

  Closing his eyes, he enjoyed her touch while it lasted. He didn’t have anything else to get back to. The only pleasure he had was in the hours he spent in the small hotel room with her. They’d seen each other twice, and already they were the best two nights of his life. No sex had happened. They were close to each other without the need for physical intimacy, and it was perfect to him.

  Was his age making him weak?

  Isaac didn’t know the answer and no longer cared. Most of his days were long and hard. If Elle held the key to him being at peace then he would continue to remain in the false position of being an escort to be with her. Seeing her reaction to certain questions had made him aware of the fact she couldn’t survive in his world. They would tear her apart, and he would let them. He lived by a fight or flight code, and if she couldn’t fight for her position then he wouldn’t fight to keep her in his world.

  Don’t think about that, you fucking coward. How could you let anyone hurt her?

  Even as he thought the words, his heart and head rebelled. There would be no way he’d let anyone hurt the angel he held in his arms. The battle inside him had already begun.

  Chapter Ten

  They met every week, each conversation more intense than the next. She felt she could talk to him about anything. Isaac opened up to her about what he liked and disliked. She loved the touching the most. His body was perfect, and when they were together she could touch him however she liked.

  Brad was distracted by his meetings with Ben, and he didn’t question where she went for long periods of time.

  When she spent time with Isaac she felt like she could have a life. She paid the money into a separate bank account every week without fail, her funds dwindling down with each transaction. Her paintings were not moving at the moment. She found little inspiration in the studio. Her heart opened up in the short hours she spent with Isaac. If only she could get him to visit her at her home.

  Winter was taking full hold of the city with most days starting out with freezing ice. The light of the day had fallen to only a few short hours. She spent most of her days immersed in a romance book with her thoughts straying to what could happen if she asked Isaac to make love to her.

  Would he laugh at her? She dreamt about his touch. Her thoughts were plagued with imagining what it would be like to have his lips on hers.

  Get over yourself, Noelle. Something like that is never going to happen.

  It could if you wanted it to.

  I’m not paying for sex.

  You’re still paying to be in his company. What’s the difference?

  The fight inside her head remained the same. Throwing the book that she held in her arms across the room, she got off the couch to pace. Her skin felt itchy. She was restless and in need of something more. Being scarred at such a young age had left her feeling incapable of seeking out company.

  Her days were growing harder to deal with. She wanted to be wanted by a man. The tears she fought so hard to keep down erupted. They fell silently down her cheeks as she walked the living the room. Her body hummed with the need to be touched. She rubbed the tears away which only made her cry harder.

  “Stop, just stop.”

  For most of her life she’d dealt with wanting something and never having it. Why did this one matter of touching and experiencing the pleasure that could be had between a man and a woman have to be so hard to forget about?

  Her virginity felt more like a burden than something to treasure. The frustration she tried to stem kept biting her on the ass.

  The sound of her mobile ringing stopped her pacing.

  “Hello.” She answered the phone without looking at the contact.

  “What’s the matter? You sound upset,” Isaac said down the line.

  Wiping her tears away, she gave him a laugh. “Nothing. I’m fine.”

  “Talk to me, Elle.”

  “Do you take this much care of all your clients?” she asked. The cruel words were not intended to hurt. She cringed when she thought about what she’d said. Bringing up his choice of career wasn’t the smartest or the nicest thing to do.

  “You’re special to me. Tell me what’s wrong.” His words commanded her to respond to him. With a sigh she relented.

  “I’m missing you.” She wouldn’t give him the whole truth. Allowing Isaac to have that much control over her would be a mistake.

  “Can I see you?” he asked.

  Her heart kicked out of her chest. The wants and needs she’d been upset about rose closer to the surface at the mention of seeing him.

  “When?”

  “Tonight.”

  Biting her lip she thought about Brad. He hadn’t been getting home ‘til late. She could leave early and avoid talking to him. He never looked chatty anymore.

  “I’d love to. Same time?”

  “Yes, and, Elle ... wear something nice.”

  “I wear something nice all the time.”

  “I know. What I meant was wear a skirt or a dress. I’ll drive you home and make sure you stay warm.”

  She nodded her head and then realised he couldn’t see the action.

  “I will. I promise.”

  “I’ll see you in a few hours.”

  “Okay.”

  Isaac hung up the phone. In the small amount of time he’d been on the phone her whole world had picked up. Glancing at the clock, she saw it was only three hours until she’d be able to see him. She went straight to the bathroom and began running herself a bath.

  The lemon scent of her bath salts soothed her as she undressed. Minutes later she was climbing into the tub and soaking her body in the water.

  She jumped as she heard Brad slam
the door when he entered the apartment. There was no way of knowing the time. From the curses she heard, she knew his encounters with Ben were not going so well. She felt like a bitch for not knowing everything that was going on in his life.

  He knocked on the bathroom door. She made sure her body was covered by the bubbles in the water before calling out to him to come inside.

  “You’re taking a bath early.” Brad walked in and closed the door before sitting on top of the toilet seat.

  “I’m going out to meet a friend later.”

  “Do I need to meet this friend?”

  Noelle shook her head. She knew he wasn’t in the bathroom to talk to her about whom she was seeing.

  “What’s the matter, Brad? You haven’t been the same for a while now, and you’re starting to scare me. You’re not drinking again are you?” She’d never thought about him falling off the wagon. He’d been sober for so long, falling off now would be disastrous.

  “Nothing like that. I can’t get Ben out of my mind. Something happened between us when I was drunk and full of the drugs. I don’t know what it is, but I feel it’s bad.” He let out a sigh of frustration. She saw how annoyed he was at himself. Sometimes, she could read him like a book.

  “Have you thought about talking with him about this?”

  “He doesn’t want to talk about it. All he says is that I’m not ready to hear. What did I do? Is it possible for someone to forget something so horrible?” he asked. He wanted answers, but she couldn’t give them.

  “Brad, I don’t know. Maybe. I guess.”

  “Could I really hurt someone that badly in drink?” he asked.

  She saw the tears forming in his eyes. They were two fucked-up people.

  “You need to talk to Ben.” Noelle grabbed her towel and stood while he had his head in his hands. She wrapped the towel around her body, got out and went to him. She pulled him into her arms. They’d never had a physical relationship, of course. Neither felt anything for the other besides the love of friendship. “Don’t do this to yourself. You deserve better.”

  She stroked his hair as he let go. The tears poured out of his eyes as he sobbed out his grief, the pain of so many mistakes coming out at once.

  They lay on the bathroom floor until his tears stopped, and then he pulled away from her arms. Noelle stared at him. Her friend was more important than her paid-for date.

  “You’re right. I’ve got to get him to talk to me.”

  “Yes. The sooner, the better. You can’t live your life guessing, Brad.” She kissed him on the head and stood up with him. “Are you using some kind of plant food? You’re getting way too tall.”

  The joke had the desired effect as he began to laugh.

  “I’m sorry to unload on you. You’re right. I’m going to head out and try to catch him at the club. Have a good night, and I’ll see you tomorrow.” He kissed her cheek and left.

  Deciding not to take offense, she left the bathroom to get ready for her date.

  She picked out a pink knee-length dress with some stockings. There was no way she would be going out in the cold without being warm. The colour would contrast with her hair, but she didn’t mind. The dress looked good on her. Brad had told her so. She hoped it played down her large curves.

  She phoned for a taxi. While she waited, she wrapped her face with a scarf and a hat. When the sound of the taxi came up, she took her key and locked the apartment.

  The drive didn’t last long. It never did, and soon the taxi was pulling up outside the hotel. She paid him then went to the reception desk to ask for her key. The man on the desk was used to her, so he handed her the key and wished her a good night.

  She was late from dealing with Brad. When she turned the corner, she saw Isaac waiting for her.

  “You’re late,” he said the moment he saw her.

  “My friend needed me.”

  “Then I can forgive you.” He gestured for her to open the door.

  She felt his presence against her back, dominating and invasive at the same time. Noelle fumbled with the key a few times. Eventually, Isaac took it from her and let them both into the room.

  “Take your hat and scarf off. I want to see you.”

  She followed his command, removing the hat from her head and feeling the rush of relief from having her bound hair released to tumble around her shoulder. Gently, she unwrapped the scarf.

  Isaac removed his coat. “I’m so pleased you could see me tonight.”

  “I can see you every night. I’m not exactly busy.”

  “The life of an artist is free and light?”

  “Inspiration has been in short supply. I can’t paint unless I feel the need to.”

  Isaac held out his hands. She placed hers inside his. They were warm and soothing to the touch. The electricity caught her off guard again.

  “You feel it, too?”

  She nodded her head, unable to speak.

  “I feel like tiny bolts of lightning are going up and down my arms.”

  He led the way to the bed and lay down. He tapped the side of the bed. “Come and join me.”

  Pulling her coat off, she heard him gasp as she revealed the dress she wore.

  “You look stunning.”

  She smiled and tucked her hair behind her ear. When she was with him, she wasn’t as conscious about her scar as other times. Isaac helped her to see past her worries. Tucking her dress under her, she settled on the bed beside him, staring up at the ceiling.

  “How far have you ever gone with a man?” he asked, startling her with his question. Had she spoken out loud?

  “Why?”

  “I’m curious about you.”

  “Do you ask all your clients this?” She felt nervous in case he compared her with them. Is that why he asked the question?

  “No, I don’t. You’re the first. Why do you keep bringing up other clients?”

  “I don’t want to forget that this is what you do,” she said.

  “What do I do?”

  “You do what women tell you to do. You make them all feel special in their own way for a price. I’m no different, and I don’t want to forget that.”

  “What we have is different.” He stared down at her. “I’m not like this with other women, Elle. You’re special. I want to be with you. I don’t phone any other women to be with.”

  She heard what he said, and her heart lifted. Her gaze went from his eyes to his lips. The thoughts she’d been having earlier came back to haunt her.

  “Will you kiss me?” she asked before she could stop herself.

  “What?”

  Closing her eyes at the stupidity of her thoughts, she asked the question again. She had nothing to lose.

  ****

  “Will you kiss me?” she asked. Isaac stared into her beautiful eyes and knew he’d lost any battle he once had. Brad asked for him to let her down gently, so she wouldn’t be tempted to see him again. After meeting her, he wanted to spend more time in her company. He didn’t see the scar on her face. He saw the kindness in her heart. The beauty of her scar told him she’d fought to survive. “Forget about it.” She pulled away from him and sat on the bed.

  Without thinking, he pulled her into his arms. Cupping the right side of her face, he ran his thumb over the scarred flesh of her cheek. She gasped, and he took her lips in a gentle kiss. The moment his lips touched hers, he was a goner. The soft feel of her mouth frozen under him made him want to coax a response from her, to feel her passion as she kissed him back. Tilting her head back, Isaac plunged his tongue inside her mouth. The exquisite sound and vibration as she moaned had his cock thickening inside his pants.

  Moments later she responded to the demanding heat of his kiss, her lips opening as she submitted to his onslaught. Her inexperience added to his pleasure. He held her waist as he cupped her face. She lay on her back. Isaac wanted to feel her beneath him. He changed positions. He pushed open her thighs as he took her lips again.

  She moaned as he plunged inside he
r mouth with his tongue. Her hands fisted in his shirt, her tits rising over the top of her dress with each indrawn breath. All he needed to do was pull the fabric aside, and she would fit snugly against his palm. Moving from her lips to her neck, he inhaled her sweet scent before kissing each of her mounds. His cock pulsed out pre-cum. The desperation to get inside her was driving him crazy.

  He pulled back. It was the only thing he could do to gain control. She stared at him with hooded eyes, her lips bruised from his kisses.

  “If you wanted me to kiss you, all you had to do was ask.”

  “I didn’t know if you’d want to kiss me,” she said.

  I want to do more than kiss you. I’ve fucked so many women, and none of them are as precious to me as you are.

  “I wanted to kiss you the first moment we met.”

  “Really?”

  He chuckled. One of her charms was her lack of knowledge of how desirable she was. “Do you want me to kiss you again?” he asked.

  She nodded her head.

  “Ask me.”

  She licked her lips. The sight of her pink tongue licking a path along her lips made him moan and thrust his hips into the air. He wished her tongue was licking along his cock. He would love to see himself sinking into her mouth as she sucked him. His balls were tight in his pants.

  “Isaac, will you kiss me?”

  He smiled, leaning back on his legs. “Yes, but you’ve got to come and kiss me.”

  Noelle hesitated before she moved out from under him. He got a quick flash of her panties as she moved her legs under her. The jolt of pleasure shocked him. The view of seeing innocent panties should not have had any effect on him at all. She went on her knees and lead over to him. He held back until she had no choice but to put her hands on him to balance herself. She rested on his chest, both of them on their knees.

  “I’m not tall enough,” she said.

  “Cup my head and bring me to you.” Isaac didn’t know why he was creating the intimacy. He only knew that he wanted to feel her bringing him in for a kiss.

  She circled his neck and pulled him down so their heads were touching, their breath mingling. The only sounds he could hear were the different tones of their indrawn breath.